Monday, June 30, 2008

Fuck Baseball!

I'm sad.

We have officially entered the shittiest time of the year for sports. Basketball is over and football doesn't start for another couple of months. It's the most depressing stretch of the year for anyone who enjoys professional physical competition. We can be thankful that at least this year the UEFA Championship and the Olympics are around to make things easier, otherwise we'd all be left with the eternal drag that is baseball, and nobody in their right mind wants that.

Baseball is the least captivating sport ever. There's a 162 game season in the MLB, which makes single games meaningless in the big scheme of things, and it has by far the worst collection of athletes in the world. They're mostly overweight (probably due to a testicle-shriveling cocktail of performance-enhancing drugs), overpaid, egotistical motherfuckers that display the worst, most childish attitudes than any of the players of the major professional sports.

It's the only sport where it's acceptable for a 45 year old man (wearing a uniform, no less) to kick dirt around and act out like a fucking child if he doesn't get his way. It's fucking pathetic.

Their fans suck too. I assure you that anyone who watches baseball on a regular basis is horrible in bed. Don't even try to test this, it's a proven scientific fact.

What's almost worse than the inflated baseball lethargy is the amount of NFL and NCAA Football speculation that we have coming to us in the offseason. Every minute detail is sure to be over-analyzed and speculated upon by every dipshit that fancies himself an expert. Rookies will be evaluated by how they run drills or by how much they can bench press without pads. Veterans will be criticized by how many practices they decide to skip or attend. Coaches will be questioned about ridiculous expectations and questionable off-season decisions. And this is months before a ball is even officially snapped!

It's a shame that I happen to be fascinated with sports because I sure could use the time I invest in them to do more productive things with my life.

1 comment:

  1. When I read the title of this post I thought it was going to be about how you're sad and missing me. But no, it's a fucking tirade about baseball. You disappoint me, Eandi.



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