Sunday, August 24, 2008


If success achieved in Olympic competition is any indication of the particular skills that nations possess, then I advise you not to fuck with an Italian.

If an event involved violence, bodily harm or weapons, we had it down:

Boxing: Men (Super Heavy) - Gold
Boxing: Men (Heavy) - Silver
Boxing: Men (Fly) - Bronze
Greco-Roman Wrestling: Men (84Kg) - Gold
Taekwondo: Men (80Kg) - Silver
Judo: Women (57Kg) - Gold
Archery: Men's Team - Silver
Shooting: Men's Trap - Silver
Shooting: Men's Double Trap - Silver
Shooting: Women's Skeet - Gold
Fencing: Women's Individual Foil - Gold
Fencing: Women's Team Foil - Bronze
Fencing: Men's Individual Foil - Bronze
Fencing: Men's Individual Epee - Gold
Fencing: Men's Team Epee - Bronze
Fencing: Men's Team Sabre - Bronze

And don't even think about running, 'cause we'll catch you, no matter if by land or sea:

Athletics: Men's 50Km Walk - Gold
Athletics: Women's 20km Walk - Bronze
Road Cycling: Men's Road Race - Silver
Road Cycling: Women's Road Race - Bronze
Swimming: Women's 200m Freestyle - Gold
Swimming: Women's 800m Freestyle - Silver
Flat Water Canoe/Kayak: Men's Kayak Double 1000m - Bronze
Flat Water Canoe/Kayak: Women's Kayak Single 500m Women - Silver
Rowing: Men's Quadruple Sculls - Silver
Sailing: Men's One person Dingy - Bronze
Sailing: Women's Windsurfer Mistral - Silver

So keep that in mind the next time you feel like mouthing off to me or I'll unleash my trap shooting skills and hunt you down in my dingy. No doubt.

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