Sunday, May 31, 2009

Parallel Universe

I went to the Five Guys Burgers & Fries at the Edgewood Retail District today and as I was eating a gigantic batch of Cajun Fries, I noticed a troubling phenomenon outside the window. In the short time I was there, I observed about 8-10 cars trying to parallel park on the street in front of the restaurant and not a single driver appeared to have mastered this basic parking maneuver. The average number of moves per driver was between 6 and 7, with one car doing what seemed like 20 moves over the span of 2 minutes trying to fit in a spot nearly twice the size of the car.

This is inexcusable and borderline pathetic. If you can't parallel park your car in less than 3 moves, you shouldn't be allowed to drive.

And since I know that some of you probably fit into this group, I'd like to offer some help. I found a British instructional video to help you through the easy steps. Don't mind the fact that they spell curb, "kerb", and maneuver, "manoeuvre", or that there's overtly dramatic music playing in the background --the fundamentals presented in the video are solid and foolproof.

See, it's pretty easy if you familiarize yourself with the dimensions of your car and show some confidence. Go practice!

Just don't let me catch you doing this:

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