Monday, August 17, 2009

Jazz Fusion Is In No Need Of Additional Saxual Healing

Pic courtesy of Google Images, I couldn't make this shit up if I tried.

There is a cliché in the music business that goes so deep that it might just be its own sub-genre. I am of course talking about the "sax/sex" double entendre prevalent in jazz and easy listening album titles. Surely you've come across a few: Sax On The Beach, The Joy of Sax, Safe Sax, etc.

They are especially rampant among jazz fusion combos and contemporary instrumental crap like John Tesh. Basically, all you need is a saxophone and the capacity to come up with trite sexual puns. I'm halfway there!

We can perhaps blame the play on words on the inherent sensual tone of the saxophone; after all, how is one to keep from making such an obvious connection when virtually every love scene shot between 1970 and 1990 was accompanied by someone blowing through a sax. The reaction is downright Pavlonian in nature: Sax=Sex.

I was curious to see just how extensive this sub-genre was, so I searched for the word "sax" on Amazon. Within minutes I had compiled the following list.

Actual Sax/Sex Titles As Found On Amazon
*denotes the rare occasion where the band name is also a sax/sex pun
  • All The Sax You've Ever Dreamed Of - Leo Potts, Claude Debussy, and Russell Garcia
  • Art Of Sax - Art Of Sax*
  • Exciting Sax - Sammy Rimington
  • Gratuitous Sax & Senseless Violins - Sparks (this one is fucking genius)
  • Great Sax - Sil Austin
  • I'd Rather Be Having Sax - Jerry Peterson
  • Joy Of Sax - Jerry Dodgion
  • Let's Talk Sax - Mark Cassara
  • Little Sax On Christmas - Krys Mach
  • Lotta Sax Appeal - Andy Kirk & His 12 Clouds Of Joy
  • Mouth Full Of Sax - Carl Ferris
  • Rough Sax - Christopher Brown
  • Safe Sax - Safe Sax*
  • Sax All Night Long - Jazztown Trio
  • Sax And The City - Sam Levine, as well as at least 3 others
  • Sax Appeal - Kim Waters
  • Sax By Candlelight - Golden Sax Orchestra
  • Sax By The Sea - Various Artists
  • Sax Change Operation - Tim Cunningham & Four of a Kind
  • Sax Drive - Richard Rodney Bennett, Stanley Myers, Michael Torke, and David Alan Miller
  • Sax For Adults Only - Richard Beaudet
  • Sax It Up - Saxmachine*
  • Sax Maniac/ Sax Education - James Chance
  • Sax Maniac - D. Melo
  • Sax Me - Various Artists
  • Sax On The Beach/ Sax By The Fire/ Sax All Night - John Tesh
  • Sax On The Floor - No Coffee... No Workee
  • Sax Symbol - Sonny Rollins
  • Sax Talk - James & Fost Moody
  • Sax Therapy - Dave Short
  • Sax With Strings Attached - Martin Piecuch, Gerhard Maasz, Alphonse Stallaert, Leon Stein, and Stravinsky Quartet
  • Saxuality - Candy Dulfer
  • Smokin' Sax - Johnny Griffin
  • The Battle Of The Saxes - Stan Getz
  • Unforgettable Sax - Hugh Brodie
  • Unsafe Sax/ Tuff Sax/ Moanin' Sax - Ace Cannon
As you can see, both John Tesh and Ace Cannon enter the "sax/sex" Hall of Fame with no less than three albums apiece. Famed No Wave skronker James Chance gets an honorable mention with two.

But I fear this is just the tip of the iceberg. My search was only limited to Amazon, so I have to assume that are many more out there on sites like CdBaby and the dozens of other online music distribution sites.

Perhaps the most amusing part of this investigation is that while doing research for this piece in the office, my fellow coworkers and I spent hours making up our own as-of-yet unused "sax/sex" titles. These are a bit too risqué or derivative to actually make it, but then again, I wouldn't be too surprised if John Tesh's new album ends up being called Registered Sax Offender or something.

Suggested Titles
(with additional credit to John, Shalewa, Brandon, Joy & Tommy)
  • Anal Sax
  • Backseat Sax
  • Bisaxual
  • Consensual Sax
  • Crazy, Saxy, Cool
  • Dirty Sax
  • Goldman Sax Stimulus Saxage (personal favorite)
  • Group Sax (obvious, but as-of-yet unused)
  • Hardcore Sax (sax covers of Minor Threat & Black Flag?)
  • Heterosaxual
  • Homosaxual
  • I Did Not Have Saxual Relations With That Woman
  • I Wanna Sax You Up
  • I'm Too Saxy
  • Lick My Sweaty Ball Sax
  • Make-up Sax
  • Midget Sax (as seen here)
  • Missionary Position Sax
  • Oral Sax
  • Phone Sax
  • Registered Sax Offender
  • Risky Saxual Behavior
  • Sax, Lies & Videotape
  • Sax Before Marriage
  • Sax From Behind (old timey songs performed on sax)
  • Sax In The Club
  • Saxby Chambliss (oh wait, that's his real name?)
  • Saxual Chocolate
  • Saxual Healing
  • Saxual Positions
  • Saxual Prowess
  • Saxual Tension
  • Saxually Transmitted Diseases
  • SaxyBack
  • Tantric Sax (Saxophone-driven Sting covers?)
  • Three Way Sax (for a trio of saxophonists, of course)
  • Unconventional Sax
  • Underage Sax (Kidz Bop-style Sax Covers)
I bet you can come up with some that we missed in the comment section, you saxy thing.


  1. I love your suggested titles!

    Birthday Sax
    Sax and Candy
    Saxy Can I
    Saxy M.F.
    Do ya think I'm saxy? (that doesn't work so well)

    such a great post!

  2. Misogynist Lite-Jazz:
    The Weaker Sax

    White-Supremacist Lite-Jazz:

  3. I just had an epiphany: "Text" is the new "Sax".



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